he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
sarcasm needs its own font
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
i've created a new STD.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Randomize
