I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
No subtext here. People are naked.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
