And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Randomize
