Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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