I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
