She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
This show inspires me to have sex in space
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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