one two three fourrrrnication!
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
