did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
