I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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