White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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