how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
