Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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