so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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