return my video game
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Randomize
