i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
