Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
