According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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