when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
