I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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