she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
