i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
