I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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