i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
