areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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