im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize