You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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