Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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