I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize