But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize
