Porn is love you can see.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
is wine microwaveable?
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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