Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
