Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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