hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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