I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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