If i come over, it means nothing
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Randomize
