I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
God I need to hump something, right now.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Randomize
