Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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