How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize