all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize