And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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