he wants to bone in the snuggie
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize