she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
