Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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