Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
