When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
