We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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