Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
