I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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