I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
When are your genitals available?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
