He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
