does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
